Fraudulent Banana Puss

 Photo by Frank Vassen.

So it's time for a random story.  Back in the long past days of 2011, my FnW (Fiance now Wife) called me on the phone.  This was not an unusual occurrence.  During our conversation she said something that was quite muddled and that I didn't know how to respond to.  To my ears, it sounded like she said the phrase "Fraudulent Banana Puss."  I'm sure you can now see the source of my befuddlement.  I was at a loss as to what to say so I'm sure I said something profound along the lines of, "Mm-hmm."  Anyways, the phrase presented an exciting mystery:  What is this supposed Fraudulent Banana Puss?  Is it a band?  Is it some gross kid's candy?  Is it a juvenile fiction novel about monkeys as lawyers prosecuting illegal banana trafficking by humans that also serves as a commentary on our view of animals and their rights?  I simply do not know and thus ask any reader, what is "Fraudulent Banana Puss?"

P.S.- The picture at the beginning of the post was something that came up when I put in the phrase "Fraudulent Banana Puss" into google image search.  This is not a practice I would recommend but it worked out OK this time/ 

Moustaches

So, BYU has this honor code thingy right?  Yes, yes it does.  As part of that, it says,"If worn, moustaches should be neatly trimmed and may not extend beyond or below the corners of the mouth. Men are expected to be clean-shaven; beards are not acceptable."  Notice that mustaches aren't prohibited but they are regulated.  Now, before I went on my mission this whole mustache thing was not a problem for people still feared the public ridicule and creeping-out-ness that mustaches bring.  Not so now.  Apparently the game has changed because there are an appalling amount of people on campus sporting the nastiest mustaches around.  Picture someone stealing short hairs from another person's haircut then gluing that hair onto their upper lip.  That's kinda what some of these so called "mustaches" look like.  The Daily Universe even ran an article about how mustaches are cool and trendy these days though I have been informed by another source that they definitely aren't.  I tend to agree with the latter opinion because frankly a lot of these mustaches creep me out and make me sick to my stomach.  What is my solution?  I propose the creation of a "Mustache Board" that students have to appear before and get approval for their facial hair.  If it is too nasty, they have to shave it off but if it actually looks nice (which is about 1 in 1,000) they can keep it.  At least make these mustache growers do home study until their facial hair grows in enough that it doesn't look gross.  Cuz, if I'm going to see a mustache at BYU, it better be like the mustache sporters of yester-year.

Benjamin Cluff

George Brimhall

Halloween-ing

So, this Halloween was a little different than ones I am used to having.  It was the first "actual" Halloween since I got back form my mission (last year's was on Sunday) so what did I do?  Why I participated in that great college student Halloween tradition and went to school all day of course!  I started out with Calc in the morning, homework, then had Physics in the afternoon, then went to practice, left early to go to Art History, then finally got home around 6:45.  So that was fun and the night time was a comin' so it was time for holiday cheer right?  Wrong!  It was time for homework.  Thankfully, the day got marginally more exciting because of what we decided to do for FHE that night.  We decided that since no one should be forced to take a test in the testing center on Halloween night we would go up there and give candy to the people that were finishing their tests.  I thought that that was a great idea.
 So the idea was to dress up then greet people that just finished their tests with candy.  After gathering a group together I realized that I was the only one dressed up (as an occupy the Testing Center protester), we headed up to the testing center with a bowl full of candy and stood outside one of the doors, eagerly awaiting those brave souls that had taken a test on Halloween.  We decided that it would be fun to cheer on the people as they walked out of the testing center which garnered a few weird looks from some people but a smile from most people.  After cheering loudly for them, we told them to take some candy and wished them a Happy Halloween.

 It was actually pretty fun and we gave candy to a lot of people and even knew some people that were coming out.  Lindsey's cousin's husband, someone from our ward, and none other than Craig Cusik of the BYU basketball team.  So we were having a ball and receiving many thanks from lots of people when out came a testing center employee.  At first we thought it was another person taking a test so we cheered her on but then she proceeded to take our hopes and dreams and throw them onto the ground then stomp on them repeatedly.  She said that some people that were taking tests were complaining that we were too loud and asked us to either stop cheering or to just leave.  So that was devastating news because we were having a great time.  But it was getting a little later on and we were running out of candy so the rest of the group went to the Library to continue to spend holiday cheer, determined not be bested by "The Man."
 Lindsey and I bade them farewell then headed back to my apartment and she did some homework.  I was determined to not let Halloween go by without carving something so I decided to carve some toast and invented "Halloween toast."  I was pretty proud of myself actually and it was a lot better than carving other things (furniture, people, etc.).  Eventually the night was wrapping up but I was determined to get as much Halloween into my night as possible so we finished it off with a good ol' fashioned viewing of Disney's Legend of Sleep Hollow.  Oh the memories.  So it was a good Halloween after all even though I thought it started out kind of lame.  Hooray for holidays!

P.S.- That headless horseman laugh still creeps me out.

Kick Start

So, in honor of Columbus Day I decided to finally start this thing.  Truth be told, I had the idea about four years ago and then I actually created this thing on Blogger a few months ago.  And now I'm writing my first post.  Yeah, I move fast.  I think I deserve to mention why this blog is named what it is.  Way back in the olden days I was creating a hotmail account just for fun and I was trying to decide what my address would be.  Now for some reason I had (actually, still have) this odd obsession with disco as shown below:

so I decided that a good e-mail address would be discobison22.  I thought it was cool.  So, I've always liked that and when I was looking for a name for a blog and couldn't think of one, I realized that I had a good name in my pocket.  Thus, the "Day of the Discobison" was born.  You're welcome.
*WARNING* This name may only be temporary.